Thursday, May 29, 2008

Fever

Last night I couldn't sleep well, I was thinking of you the whole night, I kept tossing and turning, I listened to my ipod and still I can't get you out of my head. Not enough sleep gives me a tired body which on a rainy day like today brings me bad health and thus now I'm having a fever. Together with the fever brings sad feelings and depression symptoms. But I don't think I'm going that way again.

Few days ago I dreamt of you, it was so clear, it was definitely you. Is it because I really miss you that it is manifesting in my dreams? The whole day today it was you you you in my head and heart. Fever now, taken 2 panadol tablets and hope I can be well and happy again tomorrow. I'm actually starting to listen and sing to really sad songs at this stage, somehow trying to force myself to cry the pain out. But well it didn't work out.

I really dont know how things will turn out between us, but these dreams should mean something. I wonder if I dream of you, do you dream of me too? When I think of you, do you think of me too? In my life so far I dont think that happens, most of the time it is one way love, maybe I'm just hoping for too much. But those dreams I get, it's like God telling me to have more faith, I probably won't know what will happen between now and then, but faith says that it will happen.

Learning both piano and violin now, no I'm not insane, it's just a matter of time. I told myself that even when I'm 40years old o 60 years old I will still learn these 2 instruments, so why not now? And there we go, God has placed me here so that I'm able to do that things that I need to do. Thank you Lord.

This fever is making me emotional at this stage, I miss you and really hope to be able to see you soon.

"Cause every moment
we share together
is even better
than the moment before
if everyday was
as good as today was
then I can't wait till tomorrow comes
"
- Westlife : Moments

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