Cold Heart

Well back to my hometown, seems there are many changes here and there, but more like expansion for most. Seems like I might be busy this holiday.

I want to write something but not sure what to write, I'm probably in a confused state now, I mean my heart is. Maybe I should just stop doing all these stuffs and resign to being alone for the rest of my life, that would actually make my life easier. Why do I go and worry about someone that is careless with my heart...makes no sense, like the saying, love is blind, indeed it is.

Be cold I tell myself, none of them likes me for who I am, most probably for what I have. This is bad, I'm starting to not trust any girl. Maybe I should write what I look for in a girl.

1. Looks - well looks are of course important, if some guy say looks arent important then he is lying, but beauty depends on individual, every guy looks at different things. For me as long as she is pleasing, she passes the looks test, she does not have to be beautiful or anything, as long as she's pleasing to the eye.

2. Character - I like a girl that is fun to be with. Someone who is a little naughty and can make me laugh when I am sad or angry. Not the boring types, cos they are...boring. I like one that is creative, you know she knows how to surprise me with stuffs, doesnt have to be expensive gifts, hand made ones are worth more to me. It all depends on her heart I guess. And definitely not the type that has a lot of guy friends and gives out mixed signals and in the end makes the guy feel he got played around. These type are what I will grow to hate most.

3. Attitude - I prefer a girl with a positive attitude to life, someone who doesnt whine a lot. I mean she can whine of course, but not overdo it.

4. To me - of course in a relationship the other party must be good to me cos I know I will be good to her. There will be times where we might quarrel but as long as both of us can understand and prefer to not be quarrelsome, it should be good.

And again I have to stress that if a girl does not like a guy, please don't give strong signals of intention of liking, that would hurt the guy a lot. Girls that plays are trash. Just because they are pretty or beautiful does not give them the right to play guys around. Pathetic creatures.

Oh noes there is much hate in my post, better calm down. I'd better be cold to all girls, if they ever give me some hints of liking me, that is rubbish, no need to think too much about it. Oh God help me, I'm starting to lose trust in people again.

When love goes wrong, nothing goes right
- Love Guru

Even though Love Guru was a kinda lame movie, but well certain parts does make sense.

Seems like I've again reached that stage where I start to question myself just what I am doing wrong in life. I've done things differently this time, but why does the end seems still to be the same. At the end you start to think about the beginning...what an irony. Guess after all these I learn about who she is, there is no difference between her and the 7 years her. The main difference was that the 7 years one tried hard to not break my heart, while this her seems to try hard to break my heart. Aha those memories, might not be easy to erase, but well hopefully someone will come and help me with it in the future. And hopefully by that time, my heart is not closed yet.